During the 2024 presidential campaign, I pushed hard for some sweet yard signs. I wanted a giant head of each candidate. I tried to sell it to my wife as nonpartisan and silly fun, but she wasn’t into it, so I settled for a tiny joke sign. Sacrifice is what makes a happy marriage, after all.

I am going to stash my Vance and AOC giant heads in the shed in 2028 and surprise her. Better to ask for forgiveness or something like that.

Her nervousness wasn’t without merit, of course. Our neighborhood has a variety of ideologies, some of which are less into fun than others. One thing that the World has taught me over the years is that you have to learn how to live alongside people that you may have profound disagreements with on certain subjects. That’s life. I already have my own road-map of how I am going to change things through teaching the beauty of writing to some folks in a shady community college just east of the sea serpent. Arguing with racist neighbors gets nowhere. Writing and teaching are my keys to the kingdom.

NOTE: I was in a dark place many years ago and drinking heavily. This condition made me do the opposite of what I preach above. My wife had to pull me inside one night because I was drunkenly in the road yelling “I LOVE JEWS… AND BLACK PEOPLE!” I was trying to get my Neo-Nazi neighbor to come out and debate me. Not my finest moment.

Like I said, I was in a dark place. Everything is much more even-keeled now.

That brings me to my new project, The Trailer Park Files. These essays are works of creative nonfiction, based on the author’s personal experiences. Individuals similar to those described here may or may not be used as inspiration.

While the Files are meant to be funny, I want to make it clear that I am poking fun from an insider’s perspective. I am them. Every critique, every joke, every observation is a mirror. I will never forget where I came from. It will forever be a part of my identity. I am poor white trash, and that’s okay. Even so, each person in my neighborhood has hopes, dreams, and goals. Like anybody else, many of us are consistently looking to grow as individuals, just as I am.

That being said, I am going to roast some motherfuckers.

Until next time,

JTC